The first thing you notice as you crack the seal beneath the yellow lid is the smell. The tinny musk that I first discovered when I stuck my nose into the canister is going strong even after sitting open for an hour and a half. The curlz glow a troubling orange, far more aggressive than the inviting orange-brown display on the package. I will give them this though; it's packed near full with very little deceitful air inside. If I'm going to eat bits of nuclear Garfield then I'm at least glad I'm getting as very much of it as I can.
The cheez curlz is an insidious thing. With the first bite into each curl, my gut droops trying to slide out of the way of the pungent tangy chemicals that pop in my mouth. I chew with a grimace. Somewhere though, between this first bite and when I swallow the orange capsule rearranges itself, the ingredients mixing together like a secret agent's cyanide pill to become something familiar. I am left with the striking and nostalgic aftertaste of Kraft's Classic "Kraft Dinner". My brain, swelling with the positive links to my childhood, forces out the details of that first bite three seconds ago. Thoroughly mind controlled, I am going back to the canister again, and again...
Closing Remark: Don't buy these unless you're three and a half months into a year's contract in South Korea and you're so desperate for a taste of home that you're considering buying the expensive import toothpaste and then eating it.
I'm choosing to write this comment on this post in particular because it made me breathe out loud. It was a laugh inside, but came out my mouth as kind of a half nose, half mouth loud breath with no real mouth articulation. I'm kind of grumpy right now, so that's really good. Don't go into the 'oh, so I'm only worth a loud breath' bullshit because no one would get an actual giggle right now unless the physically disturbed the clothing under my armpit. And even then....
ReplyDeleteOnto my comment. I like the toothpaste line. Good finisher. That's when I laughed/breathed. I think about you every once in a while, mostly when I see road work or when I am avoiding writing. Glad you have a blog. Will be tuning in more often. Thanks for telling me you are in Korea, even if I had to find out on my news feed on Facebook, and it wasn't even a direct wall post or comment. Again, I'm grumpy. I don't normally take such things personally. Even when I find out that my brother's wife is pregnant through a post on someone elses wall by someone I don't even know. I digress.
Here's to you and the grand adventure that is life! *raises a cardboard box full of canning jars. Clink clink.
Thanks for plowing through the whole thing dog. I hope the backwards chronology offered an interesting perspective, like laying crammed in the butt of a hatchback and looking out the rear window as everything gets farther away. Lame of me to manage to escape to S. Korea without even a word of it getting back to you. I keep meaning to look up when the 24 hour novel is coming up. This year I think I might, even if you can't submit to the contest from Asia.
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